How God is Transforming My Life
Lately, God has been gently opening my eyes and heart to how I react to others. I’ve noticed a recurring pattern: when faced with difficult situations, especially with people, fear and self-doubt take over. I often prefer to shrink away—sometimes quietly exiting the situation, but often after over-explaining myself to the point of emotional exhaustion. Though I don’t act rudely or say anything hurtful, I always dislike how much my emotions get the better of me.
I’ve tried all the usual strategies: counting to ten, reframing my thoughts, walking away to cool off, and so on. None of it worked because, in those moments, my mind felt like a loud siren was blaring, forcing me into a fight-or-flight response. And my default? Flight.
But recently, God has been whispering to my heart that He wants to heal this part of me. He’s inviting me to let Him help.
Letting God Into My Patterns
This journey came to a head recently when a situation arose involving my son and his school. I had to speak with both the superintendent and his teacher about the issue. Normally, the thought of addressing authority figures like this would send me spiraling into anxiety and panic.
But this time, I decided to take God at His Word. I turned to Philippians 4:6, which says:
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
I prayed. And I prayed again. I prayed without ceasing—pouring my fears and emotions out to God and asking for His guidance.
When the superintendent returned my call, I felt the usual stirrings of anxiety creeping in. But I remembered my prayers and leaned into God’s peace. Our conversation was calm and productive, and he encouraged me to reach out to the teacher. Before I emailed her, I prayed again. Through every interaction, God reminded me to reflect His love and care—not just for my son but also for the people I was speaking with.
Proverbs 15:1 came alive in my heart during this process:
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
A Lesson From Crochet
One thing you may not know about me is that I crochet. My mother taught me as a child, and over the years, it’s been a hobby I return to time and again. For years, though, it was a source of stress. My tension was always too tight, my shoulders scrunched up, and my hands stiff. I hated counting stitches, which stressed me out even more.
At one point, I gave it up completely, but I always seemed to find my way back to it. Recently, I decided to make a cardigan with the perfect yarn and crochet hook. As I worked, I noticed something remarkable: I didn’t need to count every stitch meticulously. Instead, I began recognizing patterns in the rows, which allowed me to crochet more freely.
That revelation hit me like a ton of bricks. I realized that just as I didn’t need to obsess over every stitch in crochet, I didn’t need to agonize over every single detail in my life to see what was causing me to stumble.
Instead, I needed to look for patterns.
Recognizing Patterns in Life and Faith
If I want to know what’s causing discord in my heart or relationships, I don’t have to scrutinize every single moment. I can look for patterns of behavior and thought that consistently lead me astray.
But it’s not just about identifying my own patterns—Jesus modeled patterns for us, too. He consistently loved His enemies, showed patience in the face of trials, and remained peaceful even in life-and-death situations.
1 Peter 2:21 reminds us:
“To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in His steps.”
Jesus’ patterns of love, peace, and forgiveness provide a template for how we should live. When we invite God into our struggles, He can help us break unhealthy patterns and replace them with ones that reflect His love and grace.
Changing Patterns With God
God used my crochet project (and past) to teach me the importance of overarching patterns. Similarly, when I rely on God, He reveals the patterns in my life that need changing. With patience, practice, and faith, I’m learning to develop new patterns—ones that draw me closer to Him and allow me to live out His love.
If you’re struggling with your own stumbling blocks, take heart in this truth:
2 Corinthians 12:9 says,
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”
Ask God to help you identify the patterns that need changing and trust Him to guide you through the process.
Reflection Questions
- What patterns in your life might God be calling you to change?
- How can you invite God into your daily struggles?
- What steps can you take to replace unhealthy patterns with ones that reflect God’s love?
Remember, the transformation process isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress with God’s help.
Let Him rewrite your patterns and draw you closer to His heart.